What would you do?
Was on my way home from school 2 days ago when i was approached by an Indian who was in his late 40s or early 50s. He was wheezing when he was approaching, so i assumed that he needed help or something.
"Sorry, I can't shout. I don't have energy to shout out, u understand?"
Okie.. It seemed he really needed some medical attention or something.
"I haven't eaten for few days. Can you spare me some money? Any amount will do so, for me to eat over the next few days."
...
Well, i declined and walked away. However, i felt kinda bad to leave him just like this. I could actually at least help him by providing him with enuf $$ for a meal. A man his age was already giving up his dignity to beg from a student. He must have been facing a really bad situation. However, i did make my decision and enough said.
Today, saw him around my school again. He was resting at the busstop. He looked at me. I pretended not to notice and walked past him (partly also i'm going to be late for class). But even though i had decided that i could have more compassion, i made the same decision. Could any student have done anything within his/her capacity to help?
25 Comments:
Well, I would have spared him 2 dollars to eat.
11:26 PM
I dunno tho, i would rather give the money to some charity, and let them do something wif it, rather than hand the money directly to the guy. Mayb I m cynical, but I dun trust beggars perhaps as much as I should. Lots of them look perfectly healthy, so y cant they work? n if he really needs juz a meal, they are easily available at temples n stuff, if he is already begging, surely its not an issue of pride anymore. prob is I dun trust them to use the money for food, i suspect they will use it for something else, for some other vice. Dun feel guilty, u want to help? join a voluntary organisation, or just donate to them, better tat way. unless its nkf n mr gold tap
12:40 AM
hmm i happen to think opposite to what occ believes in. I'll rather give it to someone i can see and is actually working at obtaining my donations for their own lives. U give a charity organisation, some goes to paying the people who collects it, some goes to electrical maintanence, some goes to the ceo's pocket, some goes to printing of tickets n flags etc etc.. But of cuz, when u donate to a charity organisation, u're helping alot more people than just 1. Though that help is, after division, very small indeed.
1:16 AM
Refer him to a social worker lah. But I think you saw an illusion, coz Singapore officially no beggars one.
10:05 AM
but if say i donate to the temple, or to a hospital, or something, esp the former, where its staffed by volunteers, u pay for maintenance, correct, but tats unavoidable, better than he take ur money go buy cigarettes or weed or something
10:45 AM
WAH LAO
really play too much kotor liao
But i am now motivated to take money from people so that they can grow ever stronger and develop more than they could ever have!
6:10 PM
treat him to a meal (watch him eat it instead of giving him the money)
after that kick him a couple of times, that will make him stronger too
6:50 PM
Well, when you do something good, it's actually not the ending means that matters. I mean, if you feel that you doing good, it doesn't matter if it's an indian begger or flag seller right? You mean you can only help people who are taken care of by charity organisations? Anyway, you say you rather 'teach them how to fish'? Then go do so la... I don't have that much time.
7:20 PM
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7:31 PM
use the money to buy him some weights and dumbbells lah. then maybe he'll grow stronger by throwing them at you. helps you grow stronger too (gives you problems)
In any case I wouldn't give money to him either. Heck, everytime I take the mrt i will pass by a guy whose leg was amputated, sitting on the floor by the side and begging for money. And I have never stopped to give him money once. My thinking is that, hey, you have to help yourself before you expect anyone to help you. If he was selling packets of tissue for $1 each then maybe I will buy; but instead of trying to think of ways to improve his predicament, he was just begging and trying to take advantage of the goodwill of people. I cannot bring myself to give money to these people.
7:37 PM
Wah tissue paper makes so much difference meh? Then sing songs counted? Wish donors good luck counted? I think no point lah, if he's really an amputee.
Seriously though I think food is not the problem, a lot of temples dispense free meals. If he wants money, at least he can be honest about what he wants it for...
8:27 PM
teach him to play soccer
can do indian stepover
8:38 PM
Yah sing song counted. At least show that he is trying to make a living for himself lah instead of trying to exploit the charity of passer-bys. To me there's a hell of a difference between begging for money and at least trying to do some work to earn it.
Anyway talking about singing songs ever came across this old lady (i think wheelchar bound) selling tissue packets for $1 each and singing song? Her song goes something like this if I remember correctly," One dollar, one dollar, tissue one dollar! Uncle Auntie come and buy, tissue for one dollar!" When i first her i thought she was damn funny, but i admire her spirit! Heard she got featured on tv some time ago. Anyway i also didn't buy the tissue mwahaha
9:36 PM
well the 1 thing i thought was that we all have different gauges on what is more acceptable for yourself than others. like wc wants to see beggers work for donations. occ wanna have organisations filter out the genuine cases frm the frauds. colin says tt begging is bad, dun encourage.
we're all just listing what we think we like. but for discussion's sake, yeah for me, i just wanna feel that the begger appreciates the money i give him. i just hope it doesn't go to the drug-peddler. Anyway as for the need for performance, i think no need la. not like i hang around to listen also. tissue still got abit of use la, but if u're more for the donating part then u dun need tissues as an excuse for u to donate ma. yeah but then again i'm not wc la. not saying he's wrong. i just feel tt way lo.
anyway, more likely than not, these ppl aren't too rich la. how much drugs can they get with the pennies u give them anyway, compared to the food they can get.
n come to think of it, there was an article of this young guy who's perfectly normal but just plain lazy, n he just went somewhere, sat down, and waited.. for donations. he got some indeed. mind u he can work lo, but he supremely lazy. yeah these r the ppl occ would wanna avoid ba.
as for encouraging them to continue.. hmm i suppose tts where the "no beggers in singapore" thingy comes in. n anyway, some may be too lazy to work n choose to beg. some might really be in such crisis that they cannot find jobs. eg disabled ppl?
aiya a penny a day makes 2 ppl happy for me. him and me. gd enuff for me lo. dun think so much lo. then again, nowadays i oso dun donate to the ppl i see on the roads. HAHAHA say so much but nv donate.
2:38 AM
clap clap, to each his own. Has Law managed to come to his own conclusion? haha,
btw, i'm not tat pro-organisation, i dun think they do tat good a job at filtering out either, cuz the means test n stuff is quite screwed up. but, its the best way to ensure u r not donating to lazy bums who refuse to work, or are juz trying to take advantage of pple's generosity.
3:10 AM
Eh you are saying that I donate because i like the songs they sing or I love having at least a tissue packet in return when i donate. WRONG ok. What I mean is that at least they should be trying to think of ways to improve their situation eg. selling super high-priced tissue or singing (no matter how horrible they sound, maybe they sound horrible people will donate more wat), at least that's better than just stretching out their hands and hoping people will give them money just because they are poor/lame etc. To me that's like giving up on yourself but wishing others will not give up on you. Which is like, a shitty attitude.
And the point about donating because it makes you feel good. Well to me that sounds more like self-gratification than helping the beggers. Are you really helping the beggers when you donate money to them, and therefore encourage them to continue begging? (Unless you tell me there are beggers who are just accumulating money in the hope of eventually starting a business of some kind. Then i bow to them.) Not that having one less donation will deter them lah, but i think we should ponder whether we are really being helpful and whether they really deserve the money before we fork out our cash.
In any case, anyone who is desperate enough can approach the newspapers wat. u realise eveyrtime the Straits Time publishes a sob-worthy story two weeks later there will be another report saying how job offers are pouring in for the poor guy.
Which once again goes to illustrate that if they try, they don;t have to beg.
10:26 AM
Taking advantage of pple's goodness is the most sinful thing possible. Yet we all do it in one way or another, sometime b4 in our lives, isn't it? So is it right to condemn them? Are we qualified to look down on them?
I dunno. I probably will donate to them. There is no reason to doubt him. If he says he really needs the money to eat, and he really dies because i never give him money, then i will be very guilty. Of cos, if his appearance is not coherent with his excuse, I will ask him to shoo away, but if he realli is weak, dying, and if wheezing badly, my empathy will still extend to him.
Maybe u all dun agree with me, but i would rather save a life den have suffer the possibility of causing a death. Who knows, maybe we never help him, he go rob and kill an old woman in trhe process? I dunno, so i would rather believe what i see.
As for the part about helping themselves by selling tissue or singing etc, i agree. However, if a man is realli on the verge of dying, can he realli do anything? I dunno, human beings like to think that the mind can overcome physical barriers, but ultimately, a human is still made of flesh. Weak vulnerable helpless flesh.
I would not be so arrogant as to say that i will have greater mental strength if faced with an adversity like theirs.
Of cos , there are many ways to earn a living.
they just take a pail go KFC collect soft drink to sell. Or go macdonald stunt coffee, tea, straws, sauce, sugar. Or can go kope the today papers.
Or can go and sign up for psychology experiments. Shiok. So many legal ways to make money.
So, my conclusion is, i will go with my heart as to whether to donate or not. IF they realli appear in desperate needs, yes i will give them money. If not, no, as shared by many above.
4:38 PM
True lah, not say every beggar shouldn't give money. I mean, hey I would rather give these pp money than give money to pp who are very capable and rich but use these abilities to cheat pp anyway. In the end boils down to how I feel when I see such pp. Got gan jue then I give money (like small children i sure give).
Back to the questions in the post: What would you do? I also won't give money yay. Could any student have done anything within his/her capacity to help? Interview him loh then send his story to the papers. Gogogo!
6:31 PM
Selwyn, Alvin.. U guys are saints.
OCC,Pnut.. U guys are cynics..
Edmund.. U are Sick..
Hmm.. When i made the decision, i wasn't really thinking abt him and whether he's cheating. If any part of me feels and realises that he is cheating me, or is going to misuse the donation, I would not even feel guilty abt chasing away.
I was thinking more of how bad will i feel if i don't give and how much am i willing to give. I tend to agree with alvin more, if i give, it is to prevent me from feeling guilty.
Would i sacrifice a bit of personal satisfaction to grant a temporary sense of satisfaction to someone needs it? Seldom yes. (Hmm.. Still dunno why i gave in that few times..)Hell.. I've already made the same decision twice recently. Seems that i'm not tt selfless yet. Anyway, my decision is not because i think whether they deserve it or not.
I'm not as cynical as peanut and occ lah. I don't think all of them as ppl who are simply exploiting ppl's compassion to earn a living. I condemn those who are doing so despite having the capability to work. But what abt those who are not. Some are just forced into tt because of circumstances. For some, i dun see joy in their life at all. Imagine when u reach a point in ur life when u got no motivation and have nothing to look forward to, when dignity doesn't matter, when it doesn't matter to u whether u r begging or working. I'm sure not all of them want to be in this state. Maybe it's their background which forces them into this. And there doesn't seem to be any way out of tt.
Of cos, giving money to them doesn't solve it. Tt little amt may not help much anyway. But as i said, it's more abt urself. Whether u would feel better abt ur deed, tt u actually did sth and not nothing to help. And maybe that little token can help to bring a trickle of joy in their lives?
10:10 PM
actually, sometimes when i donate, its because they come over n i feel obliged to help. n deep inside i just wanna get rid of them la. yeah. not like they were lingering around or wat but i just feel its better to just donate n have them leave lo. yeah wrong intentions siah. but wateva la. as long as it doesn't harm others lo.
n the self-gratification part. there might be ppl who do that la. who noes man. if they happy lo. u can't say they're doing wrong also.
anyway, y nobody comment on my post. haha. u all dun think its freaky meh? (=
10:15 PM
n no la i'm no saint. more like, simple-minded? dun wan to think so much oso la. n bottomline for us i suppose is: if the gan jue is right we prob. will give. cuz we can afford to give away a bit of money la.
n for the performance/tissue thing. yeah i meant tt its gd tt they wanna do something instead of just asking for money la, but for me personally(i stress, personal opinion) i wun hang around la. so in general it makes no diff whether they ask frm me, or just sit around n wait for me to donate, or perform n then i donate. perhaps i'll be abit more.. irritated if they ask frm me? (if the gan jue is wrong)
as for dignity. well i think it differs frm different ppl la. some ppl may be born n bred to serve. so they dun mind if others ill-treat them a little or something. others may not like to serve, but circumstances force them to, and they do so willingly while bidding their time for success. another grp of ppl may be born with the mentality that nothing but the best would do for them. n of these ppl, some may just break down in times of crisis or some will just toil on.
yabayaba. n sociology says tt culture differs from grps of ppl to grps of ppl. we shouldn't close our minds to our own ways of thinking and condemn what others do that that we feel is wrong. tts called.. ego-centrism or something. yeah. so i wun mind if u condemn my beliefs la, cuz i wun condemn urs. u'll just wun be my best friend lo tts all
10:28 PM
Aiya Law, next time tabao one packet chicken rice and hand to him sincerely lor. Both of u happy can sing song liao.
10:42 PM
teach him how to poke needle into his own body
then can join thaipusam
11:48 PM
by the way, to pk:
Confucius say, only sexy girl can set man on fire.
11:52 PM
Isn't that Confucious?
http://www.humorsphere.com/confucius/
11:55 PM
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